there were blog posts running through my mind, titles 'n everything. Then I slept and dreamed busy dreams. I have just woken (at 8am) and feel I should get up and Be In The Kitchen as a Good Wife Should Be.
To remind myself I thought I would put the titles here so that I have something to come back to, some inspiration when my mind is foggy and overwhelmed.
- The Thyroid Years
- Why I Look Like A Bag Lady (and not Marilyn Monroe in a potato sack)
- Why I Cook Meals Like Those In A Badly Run Care Home
- i can't remember the 4th one dammit.
Now, let's be absolutely truthful here - I have just added Haken en Meer to my blog reading list and the beauty of her work and photos makes me weep. I look forward to reading and drooling over her pages. I cannot imagine for one second that the titles above will make anyone weep (even if I include picture, which I can now you know, *preen*) except with boredom and despair.
Never mind, it will be done because I need to explain who I am and why and how and when.
The doggie is whining and needs his breakfast and the cat will trip me up when I walk by, so kitchen is calling and I will see you later.
Big Kiss
Sunday, 3 February 2013
Saturday, 2 February 2013
Announcement......
I just added a picture, look, look, I did it!!!!!!!
Let's hope I remember how for next time lol.
Sigh
x
Let's hope I remember how for next time lol.
Sigh
x
Well that was surprising........
When I opened the post today there was a cheque. A cheque for £781.07 which was £700 more than I expected and a £1000 less than I need. But, the relief has made me giddy and I bought some tete a tete and a miniature rose to celebrate.
A couple of days ago I had seen the little daffs and it made me sad because I truly did not think that I could waste money on them (£2.50 is 2.5 loaves of bread). I know the Happy Bloggers blatantly buy hyacinths and daffodils etc willy nilly, and it is lovely to seem them on their kitchen window sills and dining tables, but our family budget is tighter than a duck's arse.
When I told The FW (I wasn't going to but decided to be honest because I thought my brother who is his best mate or one of my cousins - I am guessing there are other beneficiaries - would probably blab) I said that I was going to make this money last until christmas. I am wondering when he will try and get his hands on it somehow, like a credit card payment he can't make, or something that is needed for the house etc. I will be amused and then say no.
This is mine, (except for taking dog to vet and a bit on my darling girl). The relief of being able to get printer ink when needed, or a pair of sorely needed shoes, or desperately needed bras is huge.
I confess I visited a couple of charity shops after going to the bank and found, much to my surprise two small vintage pyrex (I think) bowls, the like of which we do not get in this town, we seem to get nasty 80s and 90s ghastly stuff and not the lovely 50s/60s/70s gear that other people in the lovely towns get in their charity shops. I swear we have (and I am counting in my head here) at least 9 charity shops, 3 of which are the large ones that sell furniture etc). Our high street is quite small, there was a planned shopping centre once upon a time but the Iceland Bank took all our money. So now they are building flats and a tiny shopping arcade. What's the betting there will be a costa, starbucks or both!
The family budget will remain as it is, planned and executed to the letter, so that bills can be paid on time and spread out accordingly. Apart from buying a few treats today that we haven't seen for a year, I will try and keep to the new smaller food budget and shopping plan I have had to work out. I must not be lazy and stop adding up as I go round with the trolley. I am also writing all expenditure in a notebook (I love notebooks, I do) to keep track of it all. The flowers, bowls, a storage box and some celebratory doughnuts have cost a sum total of £12. Hey! Big Spenderrrr. Spennnnd a little time with me, duh duh daduh diduh!
I hadn't realised that the cheque would turn up immediately or I would have sent the proof of identity sooner. The letter stayed on the dresser for a week at least before I felt able to search for the required utility bill. I swear I did not have the energy to turn over a few pieces of paper to find it.
From your slightly happier and much relieved Dolly,
xx
PS There is a post that has ended up as a draft and not published which has pissed me off greatly, I will have to read it and decide whether to tweak and post or discard. Also, I have tried to add photos but I need to get son to remind/show me how to work it all out. My old system was fairly easy but this new one (shotwell) is utter shite. I wanted to add a pic of flowers in the pretty bowls.
Monday, 28 January 2013
Wednesday, 23 January 2013
Two hours later.....
Right now, yes this minute, I should be sorting the laundry and having a shower. As you can see I am not.
Instead after a complete no blog brain my head is swimming with snippets of things I want to say. So before the thoughts all leak out of my ears, here goes:
the beautiful yarn arrived, after a long delay, luscious colours, wrong type. Thin cotton...bugger...but I can craft for the next ten years!!! The next yarn I am waiting for is the right type, wrong colours... bugger. This has used all my budget and xmas money. I was tempted by other peoples work and the beautiful online shop. drat.
So onto the credit card (don't look at me in that tone of voice, I have commissions, I do really!) will be another untested but seen on the blogs type of cotton, dk this time not cotton 8!!!!!
Whilst waiting for colour decisions and yarn to arrive I have started stash busting and have three (yep you heard right) baby blankets on the go. Baby blankets mean I can sample all the online loveliness and accomplish something relatively quickly notwithstanding sighing/frogging etc.
Two separate friends are going to be grandparents in May, so there is a deadline for No. 3 and the unstarted one. I will gift as well as making the commissioned ones, so that make two for each. (oh and I musn't forget the booties though I can't remember who wants them!)
On my hook(s) now:
1. candy stripe moss stitch (from stash bought 3/4 years ago)
2. denim blue/grey/white ripple, will be edged in red possibly, (blue and grey bought Nov time, wool mix and slightly scratchy for scarves but will do for sturdy buggy use.
3. very boring, yet subtly beautiful white shawl using 4ply yarn from 7 years ago (economic yes?)
4. tiny stitch (oh my eyes and fingers) doily/bowl covers for friend using new (she will reimburse me later) ticket 6 ivory (sigh) cotton and glass beads
5 white (from stash) pram blanket (pattern from Modern Grace blog), simple and gorgeous.
I flit from piece to piece depending on frogging crisis/where I am sitting/mood and each session I say to myself "now look here, if you pay attention and concentrate you can *whip this up* (grrrr) in no time flat, or at least one a week and in a month 4 of the 5 will be done". The doily things will take months of picking up and putting down. I get distracted by
a) people
b) phone
c) the ironing
d thinking about housework and occasionally doing it
e) making meals
f) tv
g) falling asleep mid stitch!
I have learned to download music from Amazon through a 'Cloud' and onto an SD card so I have some favourites I can listen to. I have pieces of paper with bits of music written on everywhere and also have a gift certificate from mother's day to use (told you I procrastinate). I learned this yesterday and was skippy about it.
Here is my list of stuff to do:
Ooops 40 minutes just disappeared into the keyboard!
Right then.....I am off to the laundry basket.
x
* I had a hobby once upon a salary.
** The FW would insist on getting involved (then fucking it right up, he has the knack you know) or giving me advice which I would have to take or he gets the 'ump. It is a pretty, clean indoor thingy and he would ask me to either take up space with his stuff and then I would be knackering myself for his benefit or would want to bring (if he came) his dirty work crap that he usually brings to outdoor ones and craps up our pitch. I want to sell my vintage dolls house stuff (that I bought at the top of the market sigh) and he doesn't think that is the right place to do it. How does he know this?
PS middle son is feeling better and able to cope with the hours/responsibilities etc. Thank you Lord, you heard my prayers.
Instead after a complete no blog brain my head is swimming with snippets of things I want to say. So before the thoughts all leak out of my ears, here goes:
the beautiful yarn arrived, after a long delay, luscious colours, wrong type. Thin cotton...bugger...but I can craft for the next ten years!!! The next yarn I am waiting for is the right type, wrong colours... bugger. This has used all my budget and xmas money. I was tempted by other peoples work and the beautiful online shop. drat.
So onto the credit card (don't look at me in that tone of voice, I have commissions, I do really!) will be another untested but seen on the blogs type of cotton, dk this time not cotton 8!!!!!
Whilst waiting for colour decisions and yarn to arrive I have started stash busting and have three (yep you heard right) baby blankets on the go. Baby blankets mean I can sample all the online loveliness and accomplish something relatively quickly notwithstanding sighing/frogging etc.
Two separate friends are going to be grandparents in May, so there is a deadline for No. 3 and the unstarted one. I will gift as well as making the commissioned ones, so that make two for each. (oh and I musn't forget the booties though I can't remember who wants them!)
On my hook(s) now:
1. candy stripe moss stitch (from stash bought 3/4 years ago)
2. denim blue/grey/white ripple, will be edged in red possibly, (blue and grey bought Nov time, wool mix and slightly scratchy for scarves but will do for sturdy buggy use.
3. very boring, yet subtly beautiful white shawl using 4ply yarn from 7 years ago (economic yes?)
4. tiny stitch (oh my eyes and fingers) doily/bowl covers for friend using new (she will reimburse me later) ticket 6 ivory (sigh) cotton and glass beads
5 white (from stash) pram blanket (pattern from Modern Grace blog), simple and gorgeous.
I flit from piece to piece depending on frogging crisis/where I am sitting/mood and each session I say to myself "now look here, if you pay attention and concentrate you can *whip this up* (grrrr) in no time flat, or at least one a week and in a month 4 of the 5 will be done". The doily things will take months of picking up and putting down. I get distracted by
a) people
b) phone
c) the ironing
d thinking about housework and occasionally doing it
e) making meals
f) tv
g) falling asleep mid stitch!
I have learned to download music from Amazon through a 'Cloud' and onto an SD card so I have some favourites I can listen to. I have pieces of paper with bits of music written on everywhere and also have a gift certificate from mother's day to use (told you I procrastinate). I learned this yesterday and was skippy about it.
Here is my list of stuff to do:
- finish the fugly desk so that I can stop using the ironing board or dressing table as writing desk.
- sort/scan/sell on ebay dolls house magazines*
- decide to sell vintage dolls houses and furniture and then DO IT
- start working through drawers/cupboards/boxes and GET RID
- consider taking a table at the local weekly (it couldn't be more perfect if I had the motivation) indoor boot fair.**
- Get off my arse and walk
- the family grave needs sorting......DO IT
- And other stuff I forget at the moment!
Ooops 40 minutes just disappeared into the keyboard!
Right then.....I am off to the laundry basket.
x
* I had a hobby once upon a salary.
** The FW would insist on getting involved (then fucking it right up, he has the knack you know) or giving me advice which I would have to take or he gets the 'ump. It is a pretty, clean indoor thingy and he would ask me to either take up space with his stuff and then I would be knackering myself for his benefit or would want to bring (if he came) his dirty work crap that he usually brings to outdoor ones and craps up our pitch. I want to sell my vintage dolls house stuff (that I bought at the top of the market sigh) and he doesn't think that is the right place to do it. How does he know this?
PS middle son is feeling better and able to cope with the hours/responsibilities etc. Thank you Lord, you heard my prayers.
Happy Blogs
Thank you to Blods who asked me to keep on bloggin' (and to my other dear Commenters too) because of the lack of parity in Blogland.
There are a lot of happy blogs, I will confess I love them dearly and I also deeply deeply envy their beauty and joi de vivre.
I know there are some who have unhappy, stressful, day to day and past lives but who still blog happy because it gives them escape into a beautiful world. I do not blame them if they are able to do that.
I have written from the heart, to let out my feelings and I worry every time I hit the publish button whether there are some dark souls who will leave a nasty comment and how it would affect me.
I feel very much, sometimes, whether "as ye sow, so shall ye reap" and agonise whether I am at fault, have not been a good mother and wife, that I should have been a better friend, sister etc.
Every night when I settle down to sleep I visualise a different life, in a different house, with different daily schedules, but I dream horrible, busy dreams which scare me a little.
Every morning I wake and get on with the day, depending on my mood, black, dark grey, grey, or occasionally (for a few brief hours sometime) a soft blue that will enable me to be efficient, to cope, and to get on top of domesticity.
I used to be so good at organising, cleaning, thinking, but now I am the Queen of Procrastination, the Duchess of Doom, the Countess of Not Caring.
I have to make some (relatively) small financial decisions, which I have thought about, written pros and cons on paper and have a deadline. But every choice I have ever chosen, every decision I have ever made has come back to haunt me, has bitten me on the arse. And being a Gemini this does not come easy; to do this or that, buy that over the other, go this way or that way.
A couple of days ago I received a solicitors letter saying that as a beneficiary of an aunt's will I (and the other 15 or so nieces and nephews I presume) will inherit her portion of her friend's (?) will. How nice, though it will probably be about £28.50 so I won't get too excited. It was very odd though as the first envelope I opened was from a luxury travel company and I thought someone was taking the piss! Then I opened the solicitor envelope and it all became clear.
If there is enough to pay some off the credit card bill I will be content (a relatively small £1500 but to me, who is old fashioned and hate owing money, a fortune). Obviously I am on the mortgage and as a director of The FW's business there is my name on a smallish business bank loan and the money we have to pay the accountant (a court case because The FW is a fuckwit).
The FW is busy busy writing letters to the banks (I have lost track of what and why) and their associated debt collection agencies. We are in the right as to some of the issues and yet there is a feeling that he is partly to blame for the problems and I would rather we should sell the house, the van (I must not forget when the van is sold our eldest son must be paid back first and foremost, I went apeshit when I found out he had borrowed from our son!) and a whole lot of other stuff and downsize to a more manageable (for me) house and live a financially quieter life. I am small, I think small, I like small.
I am going to get up now and deal with Wednesday, The FW is off to his aquatherapy (still makes my blood boil!), both sons are at their work and the kid is at school, so I will have an hour and a half to myself. I will crochet and eat scrambled eggs. (I won't make a bitchy comment about the 52 weeks of happy that is trending at the moment!).
See you later,
x
There are a lot of happy blogs, I will confess I love them dearly and I also deeply deeply envy their beauty and joi de vivre.
I know there are some who have unhappy, stressful, day to day and past lives but who still blog happy because it gives them escape into a beautiful world. I do not blame them if they are able to do that.
I have written from the heart, to let out my feelings and I worry every time I hit the publish button whether there are some dark souls who will leave a nasty comment and how it would affect me.
I feel very much, sometimes, whether "as ye sow, so shall ye reap" and agonise whether I am at fault, have not been a good mother and wife, that I should have been a better friend, sister etc.
Every night when I settle down to sleep I visualise a different life, in a different house, with different daily schedules, but I dream horrible, busy dreams which scare me a little.
Every morning I wake and get on with the day, depending on my mood, black, dark grey, grey, or occasionally (for a few brief hours sometime) a soft blue that will enable me to be efficient, to cope, and to get on top of domesticity.
I used to be so good at organising, cleaning, thinking, but now I am the Queen of Procrastination, the Duchess of Doom, the Countess of Not Caring.
I have to make some (relatively) small financial decisions, which I have thought about, written pros and cons on paper and have a deadline. But every choice I have ever chosen, every decision I have ever made has come back to haunt me, has bitten me on the arse. And being a Gemini this does not come easy; to do this or that, buy that over the other, go this way or that way.
A couple of days ago I received a solicitors letter saying that as a beneficiary of an aunt's will I (and the other 15 or so nieces and nephews I presume) will inherit her portion of her friend's (?) will. How nice, though it will probably be about £28.50 so I won't get too excited. It was very odd though as the first envelope I opened was from a luxury travel company and I thought someone was taking the piss! Then I opened the solicitor envelope and it all became clear.
If there is enough to pay some off the credit card bill I will be content (a relatively small £1500 but to me, who is old fashioned and hate owing money, a fortune). Obviously I am on the mortgage and as a director of The FW's business there is my name on a smallish business bank loan and the money we have to pay the accountant (a court case because The FW is a fuckwit).
The FW is busy busy writing letters to the banks (I have lost track of what and why) and their associated debt collection agencies. We are in the right as to some of the issues and yet there is a feeling that he is partly to blame for the problems and I would rather we should sell the house, the van (I must not forget when the van is sold our eldest son must be paid back first and foremost, I went apeshit when I found out he had borrowed from our son!) and a whole lot of other stuff and downsize to a more manageable (for me) house and live a financially quieter life. I am small, I think small, I like small.
I am going to get up now and deal with Wednesday, The FW is off to his aquatherapy (still makes my blood boil!), both sons are at their work and the kid is at school, so I will have an hour and a half to myself. I will crochet and eat scrambled eggs. (I won't make a bitchy comment about the 52 weeks of happy that is trending at the moment!).
See you later,
x
Sunday, 20 January 2013
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