He has a job! I am so happy for him and yet a little scared. He is going to work in a halfway house style care home just 10 minutes walk away as a Key Worker.
He is such a good kid so I am apprehensive that he is going to see 'life' at its best and worst all in one day probably.
And to know that he will be able to, and is happy to, help us financially week by week is a lifesaver for me. I am confused as to how I feel about this, on the one hand he needs to know that life needs to be paid for and yet I feel guilt that I am going to be looking to him to 'save our bacon'. He is nearly 24 and had some depression/suicidal issues almost 2 years
ago and I feared for him and now he has a lovely girlfriend, a job he is
excited about which is close to home (neither of my boys want to drive - go
figure!) and a financial future.
Well Done A x
Eldest son still lives at home and is a part time lecture assistant and also does some occasional private tutoring so that he can pay for his PHD and travel to and from Uni so has to find approx £5k a year.
I have tarted up my page and managed to find the side bar bit, ain't I clever, I might mess around with it a little and I want to add a picture at some point but am not sure how to.
N'night x
Monday, 29 October 2012
Sunday, 28 October 2012
The Blanket of Doom
I am very happy to announce that the B of D is finished, except for tidying up and a damn good blocking (just to be persnicketty about finish dontcha know). And just in time too because the recipient is staying over Monday night. I could have waited until the Xmas but decided no, she will get a 'Pretty' for that occasion. This blanket was started when she was going through a really difficult time and although this blanket has given me some tough going it was made with a lot of affection and I stuck with it and am pleased with the finished result. I will photograph it and 'show and tell' at a later date, for privacy reasons if you will.
Speaking of privacy, which I was, I have told two people about this blog who are close, but are not likely to be mentioned in it, except in passing, so that's ok.
The FW is pissing me off but that's normal. It is bill paying week which is shit but that too is normal.
I cannot bear to see all the mad Xmas choccy stuff all over the place, stuff that I would now be buying and getting tucked away, not just the choc, which is vital for a good xmas I find, but all the other lovely stuff. I have no idea what to get my kids, tho the older ones will only get a token pres, my youngest will prob not want to ask for anything because they all are aware of the financial 'sitch', they are good kids and have never whined or asked for anything even when they were small, because I have always explained that I don't have the pennies for everything. I feel lucky to have such decent children.
Luckily there are left over cards from last year and so I will cull the long card list. There are a few crackers, big and small, which are filled and some 'empty' ones too. I have enough paper and tags for general use, but I have ebayed some little charms and beads and bells to embellish the Prettys, ie garlands, key fob hearts etc that I am crocheting.
Food may be an issue, I may consider meal planning the entire week to the last crumb and perhaps do an online shop/budgetty type thing to see how much it will be be and Then Stick To It, tho I am sure The FW will 'just pop out for something that is forgotten' and come back with shit loads of fancy schmancy stuff, rather than just plain old give me some cold hard cash as a contribution. I will be angry if he does this (which he will you can bet your knickers on it) even though it will add to the cupboards, I feel it is cheating somehow. I will stress about how much milk and bread there is and he will buy chunks of pate that will end up going off.
The house is still in a state, the roof still leaks and I can't use the eaves storage so all the boxes are in the bedroom and ensuite clagging up the place gah!
Anyway, moaning over tomorrow I will start the fingerless gloves for daughter and add some rows to her colourful stripy Lucy (Attic 4) Inspired blanket.
N'night x
PS Wasn't Strictly good tonight!
PPS The FW has just come back from pub and is making a racket in the kitchen as flippin normal, he has no concept of being quiet late at night. I am so tempted to make a racket early in the mornings!
Speaking of privacy, which I was, I have told two people about this blog who are close, but are not likely to be mentioned in it, except in passing, so that's ok.
The FW is pissing me off but that's normal. It is bill paying week which is shit but that too is normal.
I cannot bear to see all the mad Xmas choccy stuff all over the place, stuff that I would now be buying and getting tucked away, not just the choc, which is vital for a good xmas I find, but all the other lovely stuff. I have no idea what to get my kids, tho the older ones will only get a token pres, my youngest will prob not want to ask for anything because they all are aware of the financial 'sitch', they are good kids and have never whined or asked for anything even when they were small, because I have always explained that I don't have the pennies for everything. I feel lucky to have such decent children.
Luckily there are left over cards from last year and so I will cull the long card list. There are a few crackers, big and small, which are filled and some 'empty' ones too. I have enough paper and tags for general use, but I have ebayed some little charms and beads and bells to embellish the Prettys, ie garlands, key fob hearts etc that I am crocheting.
Food may be an issue, I may consider meal planning the entire week to the last crumb and perhaps do an online shop/budgetty type thing to see how much it will be be and Then Stick To It, tho I am sure The FW will 'just pop out for something that is forgotten' and come back with shit loads of fancy schmancy stuff, rather than just plain old give me some cold hard cash as a contribution. I will be angry if he does this (which he will you can bet your knickers on it) even though it will add to the cupboards, I feel it is cheating somehow. I will stress about how much milk and bread there is and he will buy chunks of pate that will end up going off.
The house is still in a state, the roof still leaks and I can't use the eaves storage so all the boxes are in the bedroom and ensuite clagging up the place gah!
Anyway, moaning over tomorrow I will start the fingerless gloves for daughter and add some rows to her colourful stripy Lucy (Attic 4) Inspired blanket.
N'night x
PS Wasn't Strictly good tonight!
PPS The FW has just come back from pub and is making a racket in the kitchen as flippin normal, he has no concept of being quiet late at night. I am so tempted to make a racket early in the mornings!
Thursday, 25 October 2012
I'm doing that not bloggin' thing again,
I just can't be arsed.....
Three times today I have had an idea, the words, phrasing and reason why, run it through and then................and then didn't. I have been in the shower this morning and had thoughts and worries to write about; sorting the washing and muttering to myself about The FW (gritted teeth he is reaLLy pissing me off now!); and later in town after seeing my cousin-in-law (is that a legally binding phrase?), catching up, ie 'having a moan', getting a hug - Thank You LouLou, you know who you are! :-)
Aaannyhooooo - I am always away from the teeny weeny lappytop, which for the moment is plugged in upstairs, cos I don't have the fugly desk finished yet, sheesh. I know I would not have made such a good job of it but it would be finished by now. The ironing board is now in the spot for it in the dining area of the kitchen. We don't put the ironing board away cos there is always ALWAYS ironing to be done, and it is a useful height for writing lists and wrapping presents on *sigh*. We have quite a big house but the space is shit, badly designed in the 70s and we tried to make better use of it and spent a long time extending it and getting it right, and yet I could go back in time and do it slightly different and a whole lot better, hey the fuck ho.
Well once again the BF phoned me yesterday, blimey thats 6 times this year - I AM on a roll, well she did need a favour (again). So we are at the end of October and she has phoned 6 times (5 times a for favour and once when I text her after being away (again) and said "are you home, do you need to go to asda?" with the excuse that I wasn't sure when she was back I knew she was and just needed to give her a nudge, it worked! )
I made a beef stew today (6 hours it simmered, it did) and The FW (tosser) added some shallots that were left over from his pickling session (little does he know there will be fuck all to eat the fecking pickles with this Christmas!!), anyway he casually said "oh I added half a dozen shallots to the stew" !WHAT! so that is beef stew with onions, leeks and more onions then, fine, whatever. At the table the fuckwad said after son commented on how nice it was that it hadn't cooked enough - 6 pissin' hours - really?
He is on a grump at the moment, during the above mentioned phone call (erm 1 1/2 hours ooops) he stomped in, went to the cupboard, got biscuit and snapped off a bit and gave it to the dog, I said, whilst still on phone "Please don't do that it makes him really ill" (it does), my word the look on his face, like a 6 year old not being allowed out to play, he then stomped back out slamming door behind him (I still think he listens to my phone calls, tho I don't know how). Today son came in and got biscuit, dropped a bit and didn't pick it up quick enough, so I emphatically said please don't, it makes the dog not eat for three days and is clearly miserable and uncomfortable and all we have to do is make sure he doesn't have wheat in his diet (all the time knowing The FW is right behind me larf). He only does it because I have specifically asked him not to, he will NOT be told what to do even if it makes the dog ill. The face yesterday was because he had forgot himself and clearly had not stopped doing so in spite of telling me that he never does, and even when I have said to the family all together that we must not feed the dog wheat.
We have daughter's prize giving tomorrow (such fun) and he has arranged the curry from last week that had been cancelled due to illness to this week, forgetting about the wonderful and not at all boring event. Right this minute I have no clue whether or not he is coming, or whether son is coming instead, well we had to sit through 2 of his, so it's payback time lol. This is the 6th prizegiving (we missed daughter's first because she was a bit emo at the time and we were exhausted with other nasty stuff. NOTE daughter has won three and sons won 2 each - that then is a scientific fact that girls are better than boys - hah!
I have so many crochet projects on the go I don't know which way to turn -
Gonna go night nights now zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
XX
PS he has just come in from pub (can still afford that then) and is noisily making food in the kitchen and probably giving the dog illegal wheatstuffs *sigh*
Three times today I have had an idea, the words, phrasing and reason why, run it through and then................and then didn't. I have been in the shower this morning and had thoughts and worries to write about; sorting the washing and muttering to myself about The FW (gritted teeth he is reaLLy pissing me off now!); and later in town after seeing my cousin-in-law (is that a legally binding phrase?), catching up, ie 'having a moan', getting a hug - Thank You LouLou, you know who you are! :-)
Aaannyhooooo - I am always away from the teeny weeny lappytop, which for the moment is plugged in upstairs, cos I don't have the fugly desk finished yet, sheesh. I know I would not have made such a good job of it but it would be finished by now. The ironing board is now in the spot for it in the dining area of the kitchen. We don't put the ironing board away cos there is always ALWAYS ironing to be done, and it is a useful height for writing lists and wrapping presents on *sigh*. We have quite a big house but the space is shit, badly designed in the 70s and we tried to make better use of it and spent a long time extending it and getting it right, and yet I could go back in time and do it slightly different and a whole lot better, hey the fuck ho.
Well once again the BF phoned me yesterday, blimey thats 6 times this year - I AM on a roll, well she did need a favour (again). So we are at the end of October and she has phoned 6 times (5 times a for favour and once when I text her after being away (again) and said "are you home, do you need to go to asda?" with the excuse that I wasn't sure when she was back I knew she was and just needed to give her a nudge, it worked! )
I made a beef stew today (6 hours it simmered, it did) and The FW (tosser) added some shallots that were left over from his pickling session (little does he know there will be fuck all to eat the fecking pickles with this Christmas!!), anyway he casually said "oh I added half a dozen shallots to the stew" !WHAT! so that is beef stew with onions, leeks and more onions then, fine, whatever. At the table the fuckwad said after son commented on how nice it was that it hadn't cooked enough - 6 pissin' hours - really?
He is on a grump at the moment, during the above mentioned phone call (erm 1 1/2 hours ooops) he stomped in, went to the cupboard, got biscuit and snapped off a bit and gave it to the dog, I said, whilst still on phone "Please don't do that it makes him really ill" (it does), my word the look on his face, like a 6 year old not being allowed out to play, he then stomped back out slamming door behind him (I still think he listens to my phone calls, tho I don't know how). Today son came in and got biscuit, dropped a bit and didn't pick it up quick enough, so I emphatically said please don't, it makes the dog not eat for three days and is clearly miserable and uncomfortable and all we have to do is make sure he doesn't have wheat in his diet (all the time knowing The FW is right behind me larf). He only does it because I have specifically asked him not to, he will NOT be told what to do even if it makes the dog ill. The face yesterday was because he had forgot himself and clearly had not stopped doing so in spite of telling me that he never does, and even when I have said to the family all together that we must not feed the dog wheat.
We have daughter's prize giving tomorrow (such fun) and he has arranged the curry from last week that had been cancelled due to illness to this week, forgetting about the wonderful and not at all boring event. Right this minute I have no clue whether or not he is coming, or whether son is coming instead, well we had to sit through 2 of his, so it's payback time lol. This is the 6th prizegiving (we missed daughter's first because she was a bit emo at the time and we were exhausted with other nasty stuff. NOTE daughter has won three and sons won 2 each - that then is a scientific fact that girls are better than boys - hah!
I have so many crochet projects on the go I don't know which way to turn -
- blanket of doom nearly {yaay} finished, the girl it is for is sleeping over this monday (see above phone call), so that is an incentive to get the damn thing done, though it is looking quite good now
- the single arm warmer for MiL who has arthritis quite bad in one arm, but she is too hot to wear a cardi in the care home due to her health - she has been in care home 10 days and the only time she left the room she upset people in the dining room by slagging the place off, someone loudly objected, rightly so, and therefore has said she will not leave her room again! I will have to finish it that whilst visiting for length and stitching up etc. She is awkward and may not wear it even though I am making it with love and for her comfort.
- Christmas gifts started in the summer (I know, I know) which need stitching/ stuffing/ embellishing etc.
- various things I have started - a half completed bag and some cushion covers aka random practice squares/hexies that I fell in love with.
- daughters blanket which I started Christmas day last year, it is bloody big and it is too hot to crochet big stuff in the summer
- Also I promised to teach a friend how to crochet and got quite excited about sharing my lovely hobby and it hasn't happened, I must contact her and say I haven't forgotten, maybe we can do it after xmas.
Gonna go night nights now zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
XX
PS he has just come in from pub (can still afford that then) and is noisily making food in the kitchen and probably giving the dog illegal wheatstuffs *sigh*
Friday, 19 October 2012
Well,
I was going to bitch about my letter from the practice nurse re my cholesterol level (5.7 ?!?!? - not surprising really, too many crisps/not enough porridge yadayada you get the drift) but as I am watching the Channel 4 Stand Up to Cancer I am going to shut the fuck up instead!
night night x
Hi Diane x
night night x
Hi Diane x
Thursday, 18 October 2012
I am too tired to type but I will say this...
It has not been a great day because
xx
PS My best friend has just told me she can't wait to move to be with boyfriend (in the Midlands) it is not 'if' it is 'when', oh... 'bye then. Long story - more another day.
- daughter has 2nd cold in two weeks, bad one this time, takes me back to the days before her heart op (aged 9 yrs and 2 wks), so although she is 15 1/2 now and 'well' whenever autumn comes and back to school and germs I hate it.
- Not sleeping well, I am having busy, stressful dreams and waking up knackered.
- The FW pissing me off (so what's new you say) - has decided to make pickled onions and egg for crimbo. Now this is only the 2nd time in 30 years he has done this and whilst I was trying to sterilise the jars for the eggs he was packing the onions into unsterilised jars, then had a 'tant' when I said "those are not sterilised". I am trying to help so we don't have mould discovered when it comes to eat them and so as not to waste precious pennies on food that will end up being thrown away. So he then says "that's what I usually do" - usually... usually, when the hell is twice in 30 years called usually. {When I am doing something with a sewing machine (not often) or a paintbrush (not as often as I would like) he will say "wouldn't you be better off doing it over there/over here/like this/that way, or worse poking his big fat fingers in the glue, or whatever the hell I am doing, grrrrr}. So anyway he flings down the lids that he has touched and therefore de-sterilised and starts raising his voice/shoulders etc. In the past I would have walked away, no more honey, I was not in the mood to tolerate this behaviour today and I told him so. He stomped out, surprise surprise.
- The FW went to aquatherapy today - you remember my favourite thing I had to give up three years ago - although he didn't enjoy it he is going again I think (probably just to piss me off - bastard), he has induction at the gym tomorrow, I don't think that will 'take' though, teehee.
- Whilst all the tomfoolery with pickling was going on, I was trying to make bread and do huge pile of ironing and also had to walk to friend's house to deliver her grandchild's 1st birthday present, took dog as well to 'time manage', poor fella didn't get as much 'sniffing time' as I stepped it out a bit. The FW had the car (he had made a big fuss of saying I could go when he got back or that he would take the van - jeez it's a 15min walk if I march rather than trudge and I won't melt if it rains a bit! controlling bastard).
- He came back from delivering ebay parcels to post office with 'luxury foods' ie stuff I do not buy as they are no longer in the family food budget, including stuff like a box of Ritz crackers and some deli pate. But you know there is always money for his luxuries, nuff said.
- He also had early morning phone call with mortgage people, he raises his voice and is a complete arse, which is not helpful to our situation, especially as the call centre is in India and he does not cope well with accents. (His failings at life are having a huge effect on our family and I worry for the future). He has reluctantly agreed to visit his mum in the care home tomorrow and I have to do the family shop on next-to-no budget at the crack of sparrow to accommodate this - oh joy!
- Oh yeah and he is out for a curry tomorrow night, well I ain't cooking as I have still got the buggering ironing to do, it will be something on toast for dinner for the rest of us. I am so close to 'leaving the kitchen' altogether, truly, if it weren't for the kids I bloody would!
xx
PS My best friend has just told me she can't wait to move to be with boyfriend (in the Midlands) it is not 'if' it is 'when', oh... 'bye then. Long story - more another day.
Sunday, 14 October 2012
I made cake, I ate cake, I ate more cake (I feel sick)
If anyone tells me ( ie SiL and BF) "Oh it only takes 20 minutes to knock up a cake" I will sm*** their faces in their f*cking cakes!
It took me 2 1/2 hours....ok it was two cakes, and it was from the googlyweb so had to keep checking and logging in again (my computer is passworded - hah FW), but I made a hell of a mess to clear up, though managed to bake both at the same time to save energy, then waited impatiently for them to cool so that I could fill, ice etc. I also managed by judicial use of the open window to cool the sandwich cake before the buttercream I was eager to add completely melted! doh.
Both recipes I have saved and will make again (success second time around is not guaranteed). My baking is like Strictly some weeks you're good and some weeks you're not so good.
I also did not take photos, mainly because the camera was full and had to do technical stuff to make room and also I couldn't be bothered and was desparate to sit down, crochet and wittle down the percentage on the tivo box (which I did by watching 3 hours of american tv, by fast forwarded the adverts etc, and some by deleting 51(!) hours of mis-recorded stuff that The FW says he doesn't know how it got there, ie Men Behaving Badly, Only Fools, The League of Gentlemen (which he doesn't even like wtf) and Road Wars.
So we are down from 68% to 57% (tho I have recorded Strictly, sad I know) and plan to record Fiddler on the Roof tomorrow (most favourite film ever...nearly, the Birdcage is No 2 on the list). So have to work hard watching/deleting dramas (which are difficult to watch during the day because we have no net curtains, and tv faces the window on a busy junction in between 3 schools, so watch documentaries during the day - see I like quality tv as well as the crap american true life crime shows - wonder why lol.
As an update darling MiL is in care home, and does not like the room already, and is cross "because people keep moving things", she says stuff like that because of insecurity and also because she has never mixed well with new people/strangers and has had no friends to socialise with to learn how to deal with new/different situations. Sad.
I am glad I have lots of friends (which I will blog about if I haven't already....I will check later) also I can talk to pretty much anyone, about anything, usually.
N'night for now, I may add more in the morning.
x
PS As you may observe I like my tv, this does not make me a bad person if you are thinking of commenting........I learn/I sew, I am entertained/I crochet gifts, it also takes my mind off the daily shite. I do not go out, smoke, drink, spend (much)...ergo I tv. (did I misuse the latin there, can't be bothered to look it up). I also talk/laugh with my kids.. a lot!
It took me 2 1/2 hours....ok it was two cakes, and it was from the googlyweb so had to keep checking and logging in again (my computer is passworded - hah FW), but I made a hell of a mess to clear up, though managed to bake both at the same time to save energy, then waited impatiently for them to cool so that I could fill, ice etc. I also managed by judicial use of the open window to cool the sandwich cake before the buttercream I was eager to add completely melted! doh.
Both recipes I have saved and will make again (success second time around is not guaranteed). My baking is like Strictly some weeks you're good and some weeks you're not so good.
I also did not take photos, mainly because the camera was full and had to do technical stuff to make room and also I couldn't be bothered and was desparate to sit down, crochet and wittle down the percentage on the tivo box (which I did by watching 3 hours of american tv, by fast forwarded the adverts etc, and some by deleting 51(!) hours of mis-recorded stuff that The FW says he doesn't know how it got there, ie Men Behaving Badly, Only Fools, The League of Gentlemen (which he doesn't even like wtf) and Road Wars.
So we are down from 68% to 57% (tho I have recorded Strictly, sad I know) and plan to record Fiddler on the Roof tomorrow (most favourite film ever...nearly, the Birdcage is No 2 on the list). So have to work hard watching/deleting dramas (which are difficult to watch during the day because we have no net curtains, and tv faces the window on a busy junction in between 3 schools, so watch documentaries during the day - see I like quality tv as well as the crap american true life crime shows - wonder why lol.
As an update darling MiL is in care home, and does not like the room already, and is cross "because people keep moving things", she says stuff like that because of insecurity and also because she has never mixed well with new people/strangers and has had no friends to socialise with to learn how to deal with new/different situations. Sad.
I am glad I have lots of friends (which I will blog about if I haven't already....I will check later) also I can talk to pretty much anyone, about anything, usually.
N'night for now, I may add more in the morning.
x
PS As you may observe I like my tv, this does not make me a bad person if you are thinking of commenting........I learn/I sew, I am entertained/I crochet gifts, it also takes my mind off the daily shite. I do not go out, smoke, drink, spend (much)...ergo I tv. (did I misuse the latin there, can't be bothered to look it up). I also talk/laugh with my kids.. a lot!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)